I don’t believe in an interventionist god…

I did something today that I haven’t done since sometime in the late 90’s (ugh, am I really that old).  I went to church.  No, I wasn’t invited to a wedding and no, no one died.  I just went to church like so many do on Sundays.  My amazing mom-mom is very involved with the church and she has mentioned on several occasions that she brags about her family to her friends there but she never gets to show us off.  In realizing that I need to get more time in with her because: #1 she’s just an incredible soul and #2 neither of us are getting any younger–I decided to offer up one of my Sunday mornings to prove to her fellow church goers that she does, indeed, have a family.

My mom-mom’s face lit up when I met her in the parking lot.  I was up at 7:55am and made sure my makeup was done because I knew I’d be shaking a ton of hands.  I couldn’t have been prouder of my mom-mom.  She’s a total social butterfly.  It’s like I dare you to meet her and not think she’s adorable.  She has a certain charm about her that lights up a room.  She’s funny and she has this ability to slow down life and just be thankful.  It’s remarkable.  As we moved through the church to our pew I was met by so many “good mornings” and smiles.  More importantly, I was met by so many people who had glowing things to say about my mom-mom.  I know how awesome she is, but it was nice to hear she’s touching the lives of so many around her.  I felt both honored to be with her and challenged to start living more like she lives.

I don’t believe in an interventionist god (thanks for the song lyrics, Nick Cave) but I believe in love.  I don’t pray.  I don’t go to church.  But I do believe we’re all connected.  I believe that all humans should be dedicated to that connection.  If we occupy ourselves with cultivating love, understanding, and a deeper appreciation for beauty than we don’t need to believe that some old dude in the sky will answer our prayers.  We won’t need to believe that heaven and hell exist.  We won’t need to live a life to prove our worthiness for the best possible afterlife.  Right?  Just like my mom-mom is doing… connect with those around you and leave them better for it.  It seems simple.  I believe it is and I want to be just like her when I grow up.

Will I go back to church?  I’ll go back to hang out with her for sure.  She’s a cool chick and these memories will always be with me.  But aside from that, I think I’d like to go back.  (Yes, I just admitted that I’d like to go to church.)  I don’t know about the whole worship thing.  It’s foreign to me.  The saints and the holy trinity and such are a little far fetched.  But the congregation coming together to be one and to celebrate life is truly inspiring.  I’ve suffered an extreme lack of connection over the years and this might be a great way for me to climb back into the arena.

Sundays are typically rough for me.  I don’t feel that way today though.  I truly feel grateful for everything that has been and is in my life.  I feel fortunate to have friends and family.  I’m also fortunate to be able to feel connected and to know the benefits of striving to connect.

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